Poetry by Paige

I know it’s not the end of 2009 yet, but waking up this morning after a perfect day and perfect evening yesterday, I felt inspired to write this. I hope I’m not alone in this feeling, but I am amazed at the end of every year at all the changes in my life and where I have come. I might not look different or sound different or have a major change of events that’s happened, but I am different in so many ways and so much has changed in and around me throughout the year. I was so certain that I knew many times what I should be doing or where I should be working and who I should be hanging out with and yet all that has changed- not necessarily a good or bad change- just change. Those of you who have known me for a while know exactly what I’m talking about and for those of you who haven’t known me that long here’s kind of a recap of 2009: – I tried doing the corporate working world- and failed – I bought a car that is perfect for me – I realized that if I’m going to be the person I need to be I have to get rid of some relationships in my life, even if it means some of those that I’ve known for years. – I’ve developed the relationships in my life that are good for me those that have been an inspiration to me and hopefully that I’ve inspired along the way! – I still have many questions about God and myself and forgiving myself for my past but I’ve also come a long way in other areas of my Christian walk. – I am happily involved in my booking agency and in a post office job on the wknds. – I’ve learned what true friends are, and am learning how to accept friendship and kindness from others- basically I’ve found that I have a small handful of genuine friends and I know I’d do anything for them So all in all, 2009 has been alright! I have great friends that mean the world to me, two great dogs that I love, and my now 6 year old little girl is growing and is happy with her family and so I must have done something right. Those that I’ve tagged have made some sort of impact in my life this year, we might not be close best friends, but I consider all of you to be great impactors in my life and hope to get to know all of you even better in 2010. Much love and Merry Christmas! Paige

I posted this as a note on facebook too, but since I haven’t blogged in forever years I figured I’d post it here too.

I ran across some letters today that my granny wrote me in years past and I started missing her and fearing that I won’t get to see her husband- my buzz- before he passes either… before she died I had never lost a relative and didn’t realize til today how much I still miss her and how real the pain still is. I thought it would be appropriate to share lyrics to a song I wrote in tribute to her after she passed a few years back. The song is called, The Pain of Losing You (Isn’t Gone)….

Kindest eyes
The sweetest smile
Stories you told
At least a thousand times
Nights we talked
And shared our dreams
I will never forget

These dreams will stay with me
‘Til I see you again

But I’m here in a life that’s real
Surrounded by nothing but a winders chill
Longing for freedom
Just can’t get there
Cause my dreams keep tellin’ me you’re still here
My friends tell me to just move on
But the pain of losing you, isn’t gone

I wake up
I still hear you
Talkin’ to me
Just like the days gone by
I close my eyes
And I still see you
Memories of us, forever haunt my mind

Now I’m running from my mind
‘Til it leaves you behind

I’m still here in this life that’s real
Surrounded by nothin’ but the winters chill
Halfway to freedom just can’t get there
Cause my dreams keep tellin’ me you’re still here
My friends tell me you’ve moved on
But the pain of losing you, isn’t gone