I ran across some letters today that my granny wrote me in years past and I started missing her and fearing that I won’t get to see her husband- my buzz- before he passes either… before she died I had never lost a relative and didn’t realize til today how much I still miss her and how real the pain still is. I thought it would be appropriate to share lyrics to a song I wrote in tribute to her after she passed a few years back. The song is called, The Pain of Losing You (Isn’t Gone)….

Kindest eyes
The sweetest smile
Stories you told
At least a thousand times
Nights we talked
And shared our dreams
I will never forget

These dreams will stay with me
‘Til I see you again

But I’m here in a life that’s real
Surrounded by nothing but a winders chill
Longing for freedom
Just can’t get there
Cause my dreams keep tellin’ me you’re still here
My friends tell me to just move on
But the pain of losing you, isn’t gone

I wake up
I still hear you
Talkin’ to me
Just like the days gone by
I close my eyes
And I still see you
Memories of us, forever haunt my mind

Now I’m running from my mind
‘Til it leaves you behind

I’m still here in this life that’s real
Surrounded by nothin’ but the winters chill
Halfway to freedom just can’t get there
Cause my dreams keep tellin’ me you’re still here
My friends tell me you’ve moved on
But the pain of losing you, isn’t gone

I do need your help though.  As I mentioned earlier, part of my weekly routine includes the gym.  Mostly because I hate the way I look and I need to lose weight.  I realized a few days ago that losing weight is great but that I need a goal.  So if I post my goal on here then all my readers will know that this is what I’m going to do and I won’t be able to back out of it.  Plus I could really use some encouraging emails and phone calls throughout the next several weeks/months to keep me on track.

This Labor Day which is September 7 2009,  I am going to walk a half marathon— 13.1 miles.  Funny thing is I can’t even walk 2 miles right now.  Needless to say this is a HUGE  goal but I feel I can accomplish it, not without your help though.  I can’t be alone in this, I can’t feel like I’m alone in this. 

What I’m asking from y’all..

I don’t need money, but I do need phone calls and emails encouraging me but also questioning me, I need y’all to keep on me and make sure I’m doing my cardio 3 times a week and keeping up with my eating and weight training.  I need your prayers, I get to where I mess up one day and it can easily throw me off for an entire week or longer.  I have no time to waste on this, I can’t fail.

That song Who I Am Hates Who I’ve Been really speaks to what I try to live out everyday. 

I am sorry for the person I became and that it took so long for me to change- so now I’m daily walking towards making sure I don’t become that way again.  I’m so thankful for everything and everyone that’s been placed in my life to make sure I don’t become who I was.  

I’ve been given a job that for this time in my life is perfect for me, I’ve been surrounded well mostly online but also in person by some people that refuse to let me fall.  God’s inspired me to start writing songs again which will ALWAYS be a HUGE part of my life- just now my songs aren’t as depressing as they used to be!!  

Yeah I still have my battles to fight but this tunnel isn’t as scary as it used to be because I know somewhere there’s a light coming my way.  ”Whom then shall I fear?”

What an idea to entertain, er rather what a great truth to comprehend. We have power over our thoughts because of the power of Christ.  So then why is it that we give so much power to our thoughts??

Why do so many of us allow thoughts to overwhelm us and lead to depression and eventually who knows where that can lead.  Well, I do because I’ve been there.  So to read this verse and to have someone explain to me that when those thoughts come about I have the power to say things such as “greater is He that is in Paige than he that gives me those thoughts” and “Paige was not given the spirit of fear but of a sound peaceful mind!”

I know it will take time to put this into practice and there will be times that those thoughts overwhelm me but the idea of having that power and that control is so exciting and gives me such hope.

Many of you- my readers who I thank for reading and responding to my random rambles- know how much music means to me and how many times I have mentioned a song that God spoke to me through.  Sometimes I get to thinking that maybe I’m not really saying enough, but music is how things get through to me a lot of the time so that’s what I use to convey myself to others.  That’s what this blog is all about music, in particular two songs by a good friend of mine: Faith and God’s Up To Something.

I can’t even begin to count the number of times I have listened to those songs and they have helped get me through some incredibly down times, and continue to do so.  Faith is a song that well I’m not really even sure how to explain it or how big of an impact it has.  Right when I started attending Life Group is when I first heard this song, and it was at that time that my “friends”, well I realized they weren’t really friends and I started blaming myself for a lot of failed relationships and for pretty much everything that had been going wrong in my life.  One night when I was working at that restaurant job, I left work and went to a concert at a church where this friend of mine was playing, I got there a little late and when I walked in this is the song he was singing and these are the lyrics I heard:

might as well shut up

might as well stop crying about everything that i’m doing wrong

cause everybody’s changing

and everybody’s fake

everybody’s wrong

they say i’ll get over it

they say time will go on

like a wave i am crashing into this road i’m on

i just gotta have faith

and i gotta be strong

i wanna be dignified

and realize

i did no wrong

those words at that time in my life were, well there’s no way of putting it other than God taking me in His arms and helping me to be dignified and strong and realize I did no wrong.  

So you’re thinking that’s cool, God really spoke to you and you learned and that’s great and so now what. Well, you should know me well enough to know that I didn’t really learn my lesson quite well enough after that one song, so God gave me a kick in the seat of my pants with this little lesson.

When that show was over that night I talked with my friend for a while about all that was going on and he gave me some of his CD’s and I was definitely appreciative but something inside of me remained very unsettled, that night was the worse battle with depression I’ve ever had and sincerely thought that life isn’t worth living anymore.  Something made me stop long enough to go through the rest of that weekend and I started listening to one of the CD’s that he gave me.  I kind of halfway listened to all the songs until God’s Up To Something came on.  

have you ever felt stuck in your life

wrong way on a one way street

no end in sight

your tanks on empty

no words can describe just how you feel

but six feet down doesn’t seem so bad

seems  like quite a deal when you’re left this lonely

it’s times like these you’re on your knees

praying for strength to get you through the day

if your heart’s been torn apart when you were still in love

sunk to the bottom when you thought you’d rise above it

and it seems the world’s coming at you like a freight train

you look for shelter but the storms keep raging

lost your hero, blind sided by the news

trying to break a habit that’s been breaking you

left screaming out dear Lord can you save me

sometimes it takes being down to all but nothing

to realize God’s up to something

you can’t sleep cause your minds been racing

you wonder if these wounds will heal

if you’ll smile again amidst these changes

tired of drowning in a sea of endless tears

you hope and pray for  winds of change

and a sail to steer to the arms of an angel

so you grab that book and take a look

tryin’ to cure this curse

and then you read a verse

if your heart’s been torn apart when you were still in love

sunk to the bottom when you thought you’d rise above it

and it seems the world’s coming at you like a freight train

you look for shelter but the storms keep raging

lost your hero, blind sided by the news

trying to break a habit that’s been breaking you

left screaming out dear Lord can you save me

sometimes it takes being down to all but nothing

if you’re crawlin on your knees

scared and struggling

God’s up to something

Anyway, there was/is no way i can ignore those lyrics. It’s almost God’s way of saying okay one song wasn’t enough for you here have another! So I saw my friend last night for the 1st time since that one night at the church concert and told him what had been going on in my life since he last saw me and asked his permission to blog about these songs and what they’ve done for me in hopes they will help someone else too. 

Thank you, mister anonymous friend/writer/singer/brother in Christ- for being there and continuously blessing me with your music and friendship!

So where am I going with this?  Well first of all I wanted y’all to know that I am going to approach a pastor at my church to be getting regular help.  

But more than that, I wanted to share a few things that God has shown me during this, and maybe it will/can encourage/bless someone else:

1- the time I feel the depression come on me the most is the times that I get alone and let my mind actually rest which I don’t do too often.  So through that God showed me Matthew 28:20b- which is basically saying that God will NEVER leave me even through the end of my life here on earth.  And since I believe every word of the Bible to be truth, I have to believe that even when I feel alone, I’m not.  

2- I don’t know if any of y’all are like me in this issue, but I find that whenever I’m going through something, I have to analyze it and figure out where it’s coming from and how to fix it and whatever else I can figure out.  Even though God is working on me in this issue as far as letting me know that it’s okay if I don’t understand everything, He has given me the answer as to why I battle with this depression which leads to the S I.  He has shown me that I don’t live like I believe that I am everything that God says I am.  

That was a slap in the face to me, I believe every word of God, but in that area I’m not living like it.  Definitely something to start working toward and on.  

Anyway, I don’t know if this helped any of ya’ll but I know it did me.  

I know that this is a Christmas song and yes it’s Country music, but it’s a song my dad wrote and it really gets me thinking. I think it will you too if you really listen to the words and the message of the song. 

Just go to this link and hit play next to the 1st song which is The Star Still Shines I’m putting the lyrics at the bottom of this blog too.  http://mp3.rhapsody.com/diamond-rio/the-star-still-shines-a-diamond-rio-christmas

There was a star in the Eastern sky
That shone down on Bethlehem,
A few had recognized the sign
A King was born to them
Drew them to a manger
To a virgin mother’s son
Who would draw us to salvation
God’s gift to everyone

And the star still shines
After all this time
As a light for me and you
It beckons us to seek him
Wise men still do
Wise men still do

In these crazy troubled times
The world seems so out of tune
Sometime’s it’s like we’re living
Without a flame to light the room
If you’re feeling faithless 
And you think you’ve lost your way
Or there is a hope that’s bright enough
To turn your night to day

And the star still shines
After all this time
As a light for me and you
It beckons us to seek him
Wise men still do
Wise men still do

It won’t go out after Christmas
Like a candle in the wind
It’s a light that shines forever
Not just every now and then

And the star still shines
After all this time
As a light for me and you
It beckons us to seek him
Wise men still do
Wise men still do
Wise men still do

The star still shines

2- No matter how hard I try, I will never be able to figure everything out and the harder I try to figure things out the more frustrated I get. So it’s become clear that I must unlearn what I’ve done my whole life and quit overanalyzing and accept things for what they are. And know that what I don’t understand God has under control and that just maybe it’s not meant for me to understand right now.

3-Human relationships are the most complex and the most incredible thing ever! For so long I thought that I was better off on the sidelines merely observing life and others. But when I step into the playing field, even if it’s just for a minute, it’s obvious to me that it’s so much better than just watching, but there’s also a certain level of conditioning required to play the game!

Just a few thoughts I had, thanks for taking the time to read them. More tomorrow!!

Life is long
And this class is pointless.

Sleep is good
But what exactly is its purpose?

Food is tasty
When did you figure out that this is pointless?

I like to write
Is that pointless?

I hear it speak to someone unseen
Of its troubles of the day

It refuses to stay still
Even while it should be asleep

Yet still I keep the stranger warm each night
And safe beneath my colorful sky

Until the stranger removes my sky
And leaves me cold and alone

But I will wait here again
Until the strangers return

Then I see a rainbow
Perfect as can be
It is now that I realize
That’s the way you made me.

Perfect without blemish
Colorful and new
I look at it and see your love
Shining on through.

Through the pain and fears
Love still conquers all
Though sometimes that’s hard to remember
When you’re going through the fall.

Telling us things we must learn
And which way we should turn

The hardest lessons learned in life
Can cut you deep like a knife

The lesson that I speak here of
Is the sacrifice of love

When you give this sacrifice
The feelings felt are not always nice

For though you know you’ve done what’s right
The human flesh will want to fight

To do what’s right does not always mean
That your benefit will be instantly seen

For sometimes the best really is yet to come
So Lord not my will but thine be done

Pre-Credit Scene:

(Jeffrey at home on his computer, playing World of WarCraft against Ian.)

Jeffrey:

Ha Ian! You suck!!  You should just kill yourself now.  (AOL You’ve Got Mail pops up, Jeffrey checks his Columbia State email) What the…. I have 30 online homework assignments I haven’t done yet.  I better print them off so those freshmen twirps can get them done for me tomorrow. (Jeffrey pulls up his1st homework assignment and hits print, suddenly the computer screen goes  black. Camera pulls out and you see him kill himself.)

Credits roll, background scenery.

Scene 1:

(Class has just let out, students are leaving the room conversing with each other.  Scene focuses in on 4 main students.)

Paige:

Is it just me or does 10 students seem like a high drop rate this late in the semester?

Adam:

Especially with such an easy professor.

Lisa:

I don’t know about easy, but he is good looking, er a good teacher, yeah that’s what I meant.

Juan:

What do you mean easy? I failed the first quiz!

Adam:

I’m sorry.

Lisa:

I know something isn’t right here I have theater with some of those same students and they weren’t in that class either.  10 students don’t just drop out of community college. 

Paige:

Yeah, and some of them were in my Literature class and they weren’t there either.

(Paige and Lisa look at Adam and Juan who are too busy staring at girls to pay attention)

Juan: Que??

Adam:

I’m sorry.

Lisa:

Oh well, I have too much homework to do to worry about some missing students.

Paige:

Yeah I know what you mean and you know college students, they’re lazy, they probably just decided not to go to class anymore.  I’ll see you guys tomorrow.

(All four students exit.)

Scene 2:

(Adam sitting at home watching the news later that same night)

News reporter:

Local authorities have reported a strange chain of deaths of students at the local community college.  At least ten students have been found dead in their homes.  Some of the parents refused interviews but the others have all had the same story to tell.

Parent 1:

Daniel came home and went to his room and started on his Theater homework. I thought that was suspicious since he never does his homework so I went up to check o him.  I found him dead with his head laying on his desk and his computer on with his homework website up.

Parent 2:

Gene missed dinner and when I found him, he was sitting upright at his computer dead!  The computer was on with a user timed out message on the screen for his computer assignments.

News reporter:

Autopsy reports show suicide as the cause of death in these and the eight other related cases.  Local authorities will be at the college tomorrow questioning classmates and they ask if anyone else has any information relating to these deaths to please contact them immediately.

(Adam picks up phone and calls Lisa)

Lisa:

Hello.

Adam:

I’m sorry for calling so late. Turn on the news quick!

Lisa:

I know I just finished watching it.  Weird. And to think that we were thinking they were all just lazy students.

Adam:

They were all lazy students!  So why were they doing their homework, and why would they kill themselves.   Maybe when they tried their homework it was just too much for them (he laughs)

Lisa:

Adam!

Adam:

I’m sorry.

Lisa:

I’m going to call Paige and Juan and make sure they saw the story too.

Adam:

Okay bye.

(Adam hangs up the phone and the scene switches to Lisa’s house. Lisa picks up the phone and calls Paige)

Lisa:

Hey Paige its Lisa, I’m sure you already saw, but I wanted to make sure you watched the news tonight.

Paige:

Yeah, Juan and I were studying when it came on.  I can’t believe it! 

Lisa:

Do you think we’ll have classes tomorrow.

Paige:

Are you kidding me?  This is Columbia State we’re talking about.  They never cancel classes! 

Lisa:

True, but this an extreme situation.  Are you sure we have class.

Paige:

Yep, Juan called the cancellation line and checked his email for the first time this semester, just to be sure. 

Lisa:

Well, I guess I’ll see you tomorrow then.  But to be safe, let’s all walk to our classes together.  I don’t feel right walking around campus by myself.

Paige:

Okay sounds good. See ya tomorrow. Oh and try not to kill yourself before then.

Lisa:

I’ll try. Bye Paige.

(Scene fades out)

Scene 3:

(College campus, police are everywhere)

(Policeman inside classroom talking)

Cop:

I want to make sure that you all know that no one is in any trouble here.  I’m just here to get to the bottom of this strange series of suicides.  I’ll be interviewing most of you throughout the week, very casual interviews, just to get as much information as possible.

(Students muttering in background giving each other worried looks)

I need the following students to follow me. (Starts reading off names) Adam, Lisa, Paige and Juan.

(The four look at each other worriedly)

Lisa:

(Leans over and says quietly to Paige) I don’t get it.  Why us?  Of course, we do have classes with all of the umm well you know, unlucky students.

Paige:

We better get this over with.  Come on guys. 

(Scene fades)

Scene 4:

(Adam is in one of the empty classrooms talking to cop 1)

Cop 1:

You don’t have to be nervous son.   Like I said before no one is in any trouble.  I just want to ask some questions to find out what you know.  Now, I see here that you have classes with 7 of the students that recently died. 

Adam:

I’m sorry.

Cop 1:

What are you sorry about son? Is that a confession? (Reaches for his gun) Do you have something you need to tell me son? 

Adam:

I’m sorry I’m not your son.  I just meant that I was sorry that they were dead.

Cop 1:

(Looks suspicious)

I see your major is computer science.  Is that true son?

Adam:

Yes. I’m sorry.

Cop 1:

Do you know anything about the new computer program that everyone is required to use for their homework?

Adam:

(Starts babbling off all these technical terms about gigs and megs and ram. Cop looks at him confused again)

Cop 1:

Whoa whoa whoa, I speak English son.  (Scribbles something down on a piece of paper.) 

Adam:

I’m sorry.

Cop 1:

What are you sorry for this time? Were you the one tampering with the software.

Adam:

 Oh dear, how embarrassing. I was late turning in my homework.  So I hacked into the system and changed the due date.  It was only one time.  I promise.

Cop 1:

Okay that’s not exactly what I meant, but thanks for the honesty son.   Here’s my card.  If you find out anything.  Call me. You’re free to go, but you should really stop saying I’m sorry.  It makes people think you have something to hide.

Adam:

I’m sorry.

(Scene ends)

Scene 5:

(4 professors meeting in conference room around a computer.)

Lenig:

How ya doin, how ya doin, good to see ya.  Yeah, you’re doing great okay good. Did ya get my emails, my emails, the one I sent this morning, yeah this morning.  Okay great great okay great good.

Hardin:

(Takes a chug of Mtn. Dew) Yeah Lenig I got all 7of them. Now that that’s settled, our plan has gone off flawlessly, the cops don’t suspect a thing.  I think we can terminate the program and resume our normal routine now.

Lenig:

Very good, very good, yeah that’s good.

Katz:

I still have some who are failing, one in particular. I think we need to keep this up until he, well shall we say, drops out.

Hardin:

Maybe you could just pass them anyway.  Do what I do and give everyone a B no matter what they actually make!

Katz:

Statistically, that doesn’t work.  I need to eliminate this one last student.  I can’t, no I won’t lose my job due to one lazy student

Petersen:

None of my students who are failing ever do their homework.  The program is useless to me.

(Hardin takes a chug of mountain dew while Lenig paces around muttering here and there and then just leaves. Suddenly while the plans continue, the door opens and Juan walks in)

Juan:

Sorry, I’m supposed to fail, I mean take my Sadistics er Statistics test now.

Petersen:

(Says with a hint of disgust) Go on up to my office, I’ll be there in a minute. (Juan leaves and Petersen keeps looking at the door)  Have I made my point clear enough??  Do something fast!!

Hardin:

Maybe, one or two students isn’t enough.  After all, the others are bound to figure out what’s going on eventually.  What would y’all say to an entire new student body?

Katz:

What do you mean exactly?

Hardin:

Every student is required to test our new computer testing site next week right?  We take this program, which is designed to make every student feel worthless and brain washes them to kill themselves, and we install it into the new testing site.  There’s not a chance we could get caught and then we can tap into the financial aid site, take all the money, and finally get our chance at retirement!!!!

(Professors look at each other excited, but still anxious, but they all agree)

Katz:

Hey, has anyone seen Lenig?

(Professors nod no)

(Scene ends)

Scene 6:

(Juan turning in his Statistics test)

Petersen:

How’d you think you did on this one Juan?

Juan:

I think I did really good. It was kinda short compared to the last 2 tests though.

Petersen:

Well most students complain when the test is more than 2 pages.

Juan:

It was more than 2 pages?

Petersen:

Yes Juan, didn’t you notice page two has a front and back?

Juan:

Not really but that’s ok I’m sure I wouldn’t do any better if I finish it and I’m running late to my next class so I better get going.

Petersen:

Since when are you on time to any of your classes Juan. Ok well run along, the next time I see you you better have read all of chapter 6.

Juan:

Our Statistics book has a 6^th chapter? Wow. Ok I’ll see you on Wed. professor.

Petersen:

Our class meets on Thursday.

(Scene ends)

Scene 7

Juan:

Adam! Stop!

Adam:

I’m sorry I didn’t hear you I was thinking about my interview with that cop do you really think I say I’m sorry too much?

Juan:

No what are you talking about? (he says sarcasticly) I don’t think you say I’m sorry enough!

Adam:

Really? I’m sorry.

Juan:

Don’t worry about it. Listen, I just got out of my Psychology class and we were on the chapter of subliminal messaging. She gave us an assignment. We have to research subliminal messaging online and do an experiment to see if it affects our life.

Adam:

Why are you telling me this. I thought you didn’t care about school much less your homework.

Juan:

I don’t. But look at what has been happening around here. Do you think it’s possible that the suicides could be connected to subliminal messaging online? I mean it would be easy to hack into the schools website and send viruses over the homework website.

Adam:

I never thought about that. We could (a bunch of technical jargon) and test the site to see if it’s even possible.

Juan:

Yeah what you said. We should do it tonight before anyone else kills themselves.

Adam:

Sorry Juan my door don’t swing both ways.

Juan:

(laughs) shut up Adam. While we are together you can help me with my statistics.

Adam:

I’m sorry Juan but you’re beyond help. I’ll see ya tonight.

(Scene Ends)

Scene 8

(Adam and Juan in Juan’s room sitting at the desk)

Adam:

Come on Juan I don’t have all night do you have your homework up yet.

Juan:

I keep forgetting my password. This is only the second time I’ve been here. Give me a break.

Adam:

Juan it’s November.

Juan:

There I got it. Now let me just find that assignment. (Juan clicks on his Psychology assignment and a black screen pops up)

(Juan makes a poor attempt to kill himself)

Adam:

Juan what are you… Juan? Can you hear me. Oh dear.

(Scene fades out)

Scene 9:

(Paige, Lisa, Adam and Juan in the cafeteria after school the next day)

Paige:

I can’t believe it.

Lisa:

You’ve said that four times.

Paige:

Well I can’t. So you’re telling me… that some of the professors are sending subliminal messages to their students through their homework and getting them to kill themselves!  I just can’t believe it. 

Adam:

I’m sorry you can’t believe it. 

Juan:

I can’t believe I tried to kill myself with a plastic knife.

Lisa:

I can’t believe you were actually doing your homework!  Adam, do you still have the business card of that cop that questioned you?

Adam:

For the last time Lisa, he was married. 

Lisa:

Ha ha.  We need to get the cops in on this immediately.

Juan:

Do you think it will work?

Paige:

I don’t know but we’ve got to do something.

Juan:

Yeah, I just wish I wasn’t the bait.

Adam:

I’m sorry.

(Scene Ends)

Scene 10:

(Katz’s office)

Juan:

(Knocks on the door)

Katz:

Come in. Oh hello Juan. I didn’t know you even knew I had an office. You never pay attention in class.

Juan:

I asked around.  Well, I guess I will just get right to the point. Why are you sending subliminal messages to your students?

Katz:

Let me get this straight you actually did your homework. Well that’s impressive Juan. Good for you.

Juan:

Don’t get off the subject. You heard what I said now I need you to answer me. Are any more teachers doing this to their students?

(Katz gets up from her desk and stands in between Juan and the door.)

Katz:

Well Juan you are smarter than you look. Of all the students to figure out our diabolical plan you are the last one I would suspect. You’re right.  I am sending the messages, and I’m not the only one.  Hardin and Lenig and Petersen are in on it too.  If you were a teacher you’d understand.  There’s no money in it and we’re tired of teaching lazy students who don’t care about anything but video games like that stupid War of the Worlds.  See we are finding the kids who get the most financial aid and killing them off and taking their refund checks.  It’s a brilliant plan really and we’ll most certainly get away with it with no witnesses.

Juan:

Yeah, but you just told me what you’re doing, so you kinda screwed up.

Katz:

Obviously you didn’t hear what I said, just like in my lectures. There will be NO witnesses (said really slowly). 

(Katz attacks Juan.  Juan screams like a girl. Door bursts open and in come the cops)

Cop:

Louise Katz, put your hands in the air, you are under arrest for the murder of 10 students.

Katz:

You have no proof, I’ve done nothing.

Juan:

(Takes tape recorder out of his pocket) That’s what you think.

(Cop escorts Katz out of the room)

Juan:

Geez it took you guys long enough she almost killed me!

Adam:

I’m sorry Paige had to go to the bathroom.

Lisa:

Oh please she barely touched you.

Paige:

And when we heard that shrill little girl scream we knew it had to be you, and came running.

Juan:

Yeah thanks friends.

Adam:

Juan, I’m sorry but you forgot to turn the tape recorder on.

Paige:

Shit, Juan can’t you do anything right? Damnit! ****************

Lisa:

Whoa Paige, chill out. I’m sure Lenig is confessing as we speak.

Paige:

You’re right he can’t ever keep his mouth shut. Although I wish a couple guys in my Spanish class had been wacked before this thing all blew up.

Adam:

I’m sorry.

Boss wild like Springstein

You do cool like James Dean

Girl, you’re a beauty queen

Mmm, mmm

You like cars and given ‘em gas

You live life a little fast

You dig Harley’s and tat

oo oo’s

I know I’m not that kinda guy

But girl I know I know what I like

You’re a pretty kind of cool baby

And I was thinkin’ maybe

I could be your one and only

You could fall in love with me

Let me be everything that you need

Yeah that’d be a pretty kind of cool

You’re not ashamed of who you are

Country girl raised on a farm

You don’t work unless you work it hard

Mmm, mmm

C’mon take me for a ride

Show me how to live the wild side*

I want to live that kinda li

ii ife

I know I’m not that kinda guy

But girl I know I know what I like

You’re a pretty kind of cool baby

And I was thinkin’ maybe

I could be your one and only

You could fall in love with me

Let me be everything that you need

Yeah that’d be a pretty kind of cool

You’re so this and that

I’m so that and this

Baby I want you

Baby I want your kiss

The sting of silence has taken its hold

Depression has draped its weighted net over the house

Family connections are lost

In the corner sits a locked box

Filled with laughter, love and what used to be

Everyone longs to open it but no one has the key

As night falls and all grows dark

Your friends have fled; family is too far 

To hear the cry for help, possessions have been sold

Sacrifices too costly have been made 

There is nothing more to be done, nowhere else to turn

Where is the key, who holds the answers

Help must arrive before the Titanic sinks again

And is forgotten and forever lost